Lately, it feels like I’ve developed some sort of horrible social disease that’s turned me into a social pariah. It feels like there’s a big party happening and I’m the only one who’s not been invited. I don’t normally feel like that but of late, I’ve noticed my thoughts drifting more and more in that direction.
A couple of weeks ago, I attended my first non-food blogging conference and while the conference wasn’t quite what I expected, there were two presentations, given by Sharon Devellis and Elan Morgan, that hit home with me. While some of these may seem pretty self-evident, clearly I needed to be in that room, at that time, on that day, to get those messages.
Truth #1 - I am not a famous blogger
Insert any name you’d like but I’ll never be them, cause I am me. I am my own individual with different skills, outlook and creativity so my experiences and outcomes will be different. I need to stop comparing my success to others and start comparing myself against where I’ve been, what I’ve done and how much I’ve achieved since I started blogging 1.5 years ago.
I’ve been on a transformational journey for the last couple of years and I found my way to this path recently. I can’t expect to go to bed one night and morph into Sunny Andersen by morning. I can try as hard as I can but I’ll never be Sunny, I’ll only ever be Rhonda and that’s A-OK.
Truth #2 - Quit focusing on what everyone else is doing.
In her presentation, Sharon told us that Twitter and Facebook are evil, and I’m adding Instagram to that pile. I’ve seen people tweeting or instagramming from the #FunnestEventEver and I may have been bitter because I really wanted to have been invited to that party.
My reality is that that my job is very demanding, and I often work late. If you see me tweeting, or instagramming during the day I’m either off, on the train, in a cab on my way to a meeting, or in the bathroom (where I sometimes go to get a bit of a break). So I can’t be at every #FunnestEventEver so I’m going to be happy for my fellow bloggers when they go, and make the most of any opportunities that are presented to me.
Truth #3 - Quit thinking that what I do is special
I am a blogger. I’m one of a couple hundred thousand people in North America who blog. I have an opinion about food, cooking, life everything and I write it down and other people read it. Does this make me special? According to Sharon, it doesn’t make me special.
WTH? Who is this woman and why am I not special? After I finished being offended, I listened and got that what I do isn’t special; it’s how I do it. I need to focus on honing my voice, putting my stamp on my stories so that you can “hear me” in them.
Truth #4 - My success might not look like anything that I think it should
When I first started blogging and I spent a lot of time analyzing how others achieved their success, and I tried to figure out how I could replicate that. I learned that my idea of success will probably not be my reality of success; it’ll probably be better than anything I can ever imagine. Elan was right, I’m in the middle of my story and the beauty of that is that means there’s still time to write how my story ends.
Truth #5 - Quit thinking it’s going be easy
I am very successful in my professional life. I’m confident, in charge and command respect for the work that I do. My opinion matters, but it’s taken almost 20 years to build up that expertise. I knew it wasn’t going to be easy to develop a new area of expertise, it’s unsettling, at times scary and I find that I have to consciously will myself out of my comfort zone. According to the presenter Sharon, doing something that scares you is empowering and helps you become mentally tougher and that toughness is ultimately what helps you to succeed.
Last Friday was a tough day at work, made even tougher by the tweets from people at the #FunnestEventEver. I got home poured myself a glass of wine, pulled out my vision board and started refining my path to the success that I know I’m eventually going to claim as my own.
Copyright © 2013, Olive & Ruby. All rights reserved.